A month in India, part 4: Dhoom 3 on Dhoom Day, Kolkata.

If Indian film promotion is a hurricane, then the first 10 days of our time in India were spent in the eye of the storm known as Dhoom 3. This was not a thing you could avoid, from Kolkata's metro platforms to the road crossing near our hotel, where a bowler hat-wearing Aamir Khan gazed over us. Promos on TV, posters on walls, advertisements on our morning papers - we saw it all.

And yet, we didn't mind one bit. This was the craze we'd signed up for - this was the movie that would be descending on India, and we knew precisely what we were in for. We smiled at every piece of gross, over-exposed piece of promotion we ran into, I worried over one restaurant supper whether we'd make it in time to catch Aamir's Koffee with Karan episode in the hotel room (which I got to watch and it was a blast). There probably should've been a moment where one went, "Okay, enough with this Dhoom 3 already!" and yet there kind of never was? We ate it up, eagerly.

In an ironic twist, perhaps, we watched the megalomaniac Bollywood big budget blockbuster in the city of art cinema, Kolkata, at a southern Kolkata multiplex called London Paris ("Just like home, eh?" I asked my Londoner friend). The tickets were the most expensive movie tickets we'd ever bought in India, 350 rupees each, but the seats reclined nicely, the atmosphere was excellent, and this was the opening Friday night, so one could expect to pay a premium (and compared to Finnish movie ticket prices, this was peanuts).

So what about the actual film itself? The glorious sequel to the maddest madcap action film series the world has ever seen? (And yes, the Fast and the Furious films are quite madcap as well, but they never had Vin Diesel dressing up as the Queen of England, so I think Dhoom still wins over its original inspiration.) Well, this was, in many ways, a very loyal sequel to the previous two. The villain still gets center stage, and any badassery and action sequences that Jai and Ali (Abhishek Bachchan and Uday Chopra, respectively) receive is almost like a pity hand-out, because it's not quite a Dhoom movie without them, and yet you get the sense that both of the sequels have kind of wished they could let these two characters go already. The women are still ludicrously under-written or just plain ludicrous, and mostly there to show off some skin, and dance in some songs. The action is reaching new heights, or new laws of physics.

And yet Dhoom 3 is different. It contains an emotional heart that doesn't quite sit with everything that's been wrapped around it - the formula, that is. It has a central performance that simultaneously makes you gasp in awe and then squirm in discomfort. It was a love story that is criminally (pun intended) underwritten and yet quite sweet. It falls somewhat short on the chemistry between Jai and the villain, which was largely the tentpole that held up the previous two films, but it's still good - replacing this is a chemistry between, well, two other leads.

The soundtrack is a winner from top to bottom, at least in my books. The tap dance spin on the Dhoom Machale number seems gimmicky but sounds and looks legitimately awesome, the circus picturization of Malang is just stunning, and Tu Hi Junoon is a winner all the way. Of course, my love for these songs is peppered by the nostalgia of hearing them during the trip, seeing all of those promos pop up here and there, plus the fact that these are absolutely amazing picturizations to be watched on the big screen.

Dhoom films will always defy logic and be considered as bad by some as they are considered amazing by others. As much as I try to rate these films in a sphere of their own, not to be compared or contrasted against any other films but each other, I can't help but feel that what I told my friend, walking to a Bengali restaurant after the movie, is very true: "This was the most amazing bad movie I have ever seen. Loved it. Will hear nothing bad against it." And yet something bad is precisely what I'm about to voice about it.

Even in the conventional masala madcap forgiveness, one has to forgive Dhoom 3 for a lot of things. Its attempts at being so so cool undercut its desire to be a legitimately good movie with an emotional core. The way it ignores Katrina Kaif's character for most of the movie, barely giving her any lines, barely ever giving her an actual characterisation, only hampers the story as a whole. While Ali's Mumbaiyya lines brought some people in the audience to tears with laughter, many others in the audience, including myself, remained stoic and didn't bite. As slick as it is, as wild as it is, as good (and as bad) as Aamir Khan's performance is, the fact remains it just isn't as good as it could be.

And yet, it's absolutely fantastic, without a doubt my favourite of the film series, and the sole Dhoom film I'll be glad to own on DVD. You should probably see it, for many a reason, and expect nothing, and expect everything, and know that when back in the day some of us theorised about what kind of a Dhoom film they'd have to make to convince Aamir Khan to join it, we didn't quite know it would be this epic a result.

Rewatch magic: Paa & Mujhse Fraaandship Karoge.

When I first saw Paa, I was sure my extreme emotional reaction to it was a fluke. It wasn't a hyperbole to say I cried my eyes out throughout the movie, by the end letting out dry sobs because I had no tears left. It was so bizarre - this had never happened to me with any movie, and I had watched a fair bit of tear-jerkers in my time. So it had to be something other than the film, causing this reaction - maybe it was just my mood to cry my eyes out, and the movie gave me good impetus to do so without feeling silly for it. 

This is not to say anything against the film. It's a damn good one, and even if I was wary of the "gimmick" of having the son (Abhishek) play the father, and the father (Amitabh Bachchan) play the son, who suffers from progeria. Acting through prosthetic make-up is difficult for anybody, and Amitabh-ji was praised through the roof for this performance, and I wondered whether that was because of the performance, or his star power combined with the braveness of taking such a role.

Thankfully, the movie puts the story and its characters front and center, thus making sure you almost forget about the gimmick entirely. And even if the film is named 'father', the mother is the real highlight here - I feel like Paa was the first role where Vidya Balan was just staggeringly amazing, and I'm pretty sure I cried the hardest whenever her character cried. 

I went into my rewatch thinking that I probably wouldn't be so emotionally prodded by the movie, as I remembered crying at so many lines and so many scenes. This time, I thought, I'd know what was coming - surely that had to make it less emotionally impacting? 

Well, it did not. Not only did I cry my one paper tissue soggy, I was also so mesmerized by the film I couldn't just hit pause and go get another one. When the climactic scene arrives, even though I knew what was coming, even though I had seen it coming miles away, I was just completely broken. If my tear ducts had any moisture left, it was all let out by the end of the film. Again.

So I keep wondering. What is it about this story that just gets to me? I don't feel like there's anything particularly personal about the story for me, so it's not like it reflects my own life in any way. I suspect some other fans of the film may feel the same way, but considering I'm not really the tear-jerker person, nor does this film get consistently mentioned among the best or most favourite films (hell, even I don't regularly list it as one), I'm kind of puzzled. The performances are all great, the musical cues certainly heighten those performances, and the soundtrack is wonderful, but I still don't know why this movie leaves such an impact on me. The only thing I know is that on my next rewatch, I'll know to prepare more tissues. 

Mujhse Fraaandship Karoge, on the other hand, remains the perfect rainy day romcom to watch. I wonder if Kunal Kohli feels that way, too - since I recently realized, being a little slow I guess, that Fraaandship is basically a modernized version of Mujhse Dosti Karoge. MDK, of course, and this has been admitted by Kohli himself, was kind of a dated movie even when it came out. It was a late 90's film for the early 00's, and though it has some redeeming features (that Antakshari song or the completely filmi and wonderful climax), it's not really one to remember much nowadays.

I wondered about the expiration date of Fraandship as I rewatched. Preity and Vishal fall in love via Facebook by impersonating their friends, and while social networking could be here to stay, youth culture does tend to change rather rapidly - what's cool one minute tends to not be so cool the next. Still, from the marketing perspective (ugh, yes, the kind of phrase I never wanted to type), it makes sense to give the youth films that portray characters who are also young, and hopefully in a way that's realistic but still idealized.

Another thing I picked up on was that the film was directed by a woman, Nupur Ashtana, which is sadly a rare thing world over. Good on Y-Films for finally getting some women directors in the fray as well (will mothership Yash Raj Films follow suit sometime in the future?).

I also thought about the message the film sends. As with any glossy romcoms, there is some focus on superficial traits, but what is notable in Fraaandship is how personality, chemistry and compatibility win out in the end. Preity and Vishal have instant chemistry online, but they continue to bicker with one another face-to-face. There is also no "make-over moment" - when Vishal sees Preity all dolled up for the club, he still doesn't seem all that interested. 

When Rahul and Mallika (the friends whose online identities our hero and heroine adopt) first meet, they don't seem to hit it off that well, even though they are both very attractive people. However, once they get to talking and discover they actually have some things in common, they become more interested in one another.

I know it's not much, but I'll take it as it's so much more likable and relatable than the films with paper-thin characterizations and so much emphasis on fashion and looking cool, hot, whatever. Of course films will always try to sell a very glamorous image, and that includes the superficial focus, but actors shouldn't just be moving clothes racks for the latest designer clothes. So for all its classic mainstream film traits, at least Fraaandship is putting a simple, yet agreeable message out there.

30 Days of Film: Days 6 & 7.

6. Your favorite film from your favorite comedian

In the original version of this meme, when I took it from a blog where the person mainly watched English language films, Day 6 was "Favorite made for TV movie". To my knowledge, India doesn't really make films for TV, or at least I've never seen one, so I altered this a bit. If you're looking to do this meme for all cinema, feel free to change it back to its original form, or alter it again, I really don't mind.

Saamy is a nice Vikram action entertainer which also stars Trisha, but what really pushed it from an okay film I might enjoy rewatching to a film I knew I had to own, was the Vivek comedy track. In the film, he plays a priest that points of logical fallacies and superstitions of people that make no sense, or would be more beneficial to society if ceased. While I can't say I connect to any of these points as I'm not from the culture where these practises exist, I like the societal flavour to the comedy, and Vivek is just great in general. (For a general, and weirdly enough, bilingual review of the film, click here.)

7.  The most surprising plot twist or ending

Truth be told, I'm not huge on plot twists or surprise endings. In my mind, far too many stories rely on them - the "I didn't see that coming" can be awesome when it's actually well-built in terms of little clues that you as the viewer didn't pay enough attention to. In things like thrillers or other suspense-filled genre flicks, you almost expect the big plot twist, so much so that if one arrives, you probably did see it coming, because your brain already worked out all the potential alternatives. What I'm saying is - in certain ways, the plot twist has become a cliché.

There are certainly bad examples (Race) of plot twists, but favourites, hmm. I always had a soft spot for Abhishek's Bluffmaster, even if it is a remake ... and because it is one, it doesn't really count, does it now?

Then there's the film where the plot twist is so good, you almost don't want to mention the film, as to not spoil it to anyone. You'll probably know which one I mean if I just say this: Kolkatta...

That confusing note is all I'll say about my favourite.

30 Days of Film - Day 4.

4. A movie that makes you sad

I don't think there is a film that is more of a perfect tearjerker than Paa out there in the world. It completely caught me off-guard in how it tugged at every heart-string I had, and how strongly it made me buy into the premise that should've perhaps been a little too hard to swallow (mainly the gimmick-y idea that here was Amitabh Bachchan playing the son to his own son, Abhishek). But somehow the film pulls it off brilliantly. The plot is Hindi films' stock-in-trade of a family coming together after being separated, but the how's and why's of the story are just well-told and the performances lift the story into major tearjerker territory. 

Everything from the love story between Abhishek and Vidya Balan's characters to the father-son relationship just makes me weep. I was a complete mess after watching the film; so much so I haven't dared to rewatch it. I suppose it's a bit of a misnomer to say this is a film that makes me sad - sometimes you cry because something is touching, or precious, or beautiful, or finally happening. It's only part of the time that you in cry in Paa because it's making you sad. 

For truly, truly depressing cinema, I tend to go for Tamil director Bala's hopeless brand of cinema, but for a tearjerker, Paa is unbeatable for me.

A small comforting thought: Abhishek Bachchan.

Whenever I think about the new batch of actors and actresses, the ones who've debuted in the period of 2009 - present, I keep this in mind: it took Abhishek Bachchan four years to show promise (Yuva), five years to deliver on that promise (Bluffmaster, Bunty aur Babli), and six years to really make it (Guru). The fact of the matter is, I'm really unimpressed by most of these new stars. I like some of them, but not that much. I see promise in a few of them, but again, I'm not feeling any passion yet.
Of course, it bears mentioning that times have changed. The early 00's were a different time, and not to get all nostalgic for a period that wasn't perhaps any sort of high point in Hindi film history - though good movies were made, as always - but nowadays, it just seems that everything moves faster. Stars are debuting in big films, and the pressure is on to make it faster. You've got to be good, and to be fair, most of them are good - well, most of them can dance and look good, at the very least. But that special charm is still missing, that acting ability that has to be beneath the abs or the gorgeous face in order for you to really win the audience over.
Again, this is fully subjective. If you feel like these new stars have what it takes already, more power to you; you'll get to enjoy their movies more. For me, that just hasn't clicked yet.

But if there's anything I hate, it's sounding like an old grump when I don't feel like one. I'm open-minded, I'm keeping my eyes open, I'm watching films with these new stars even though I'm not passionate about any of them.
And most of all, I remind myself: these things can take years, like they did for Abhishek, or Kareena.
As long as they don't take decades, like with Saif Ali Khan, I think I'm content in waiting...

Ek main aur ek tu hai.. Random thoughts about hiphop.

This post is just some thoughts inspired by Switty Tera Pyar Chaida, a promotional video for Delhi Belly, and Filmi Girl's brief thoughts on it that inspired debate in the comments of this post, as well as Twitter debate that touched on the same topic (I don't know how to link to this so I won't).


I think when it comes to the intersection of hiphop and Bollywood, there are numerous points to consider.

1) Globalness of goth genres. It's clear that these two would not intersect if it were not for the global popularity of hiphop, or the popularity of Bollywood films outside India. But the fact that they are global, brings up a question that problematizes the 'globalness' of them. So we understand hiphop and Bollywood as "things" or as "genres"?

If we classify them as "things", then they can be more clearly defined and located. Hiphop music and culture becomes something that stemmed from the experiences of black Americans in the late 1970's and onwards. It's not just a genre of music with certain characteristics - it's a thing with a certain, definite history. Bollywood as "a thing" would be mainstream Hindi films produced in Bombay/Mumbai.

As genres, I think the boundaries somewhat disappear. A musical dance number in an American sitcom can be considered in the "Bollywood genre", despite it not being in Hindi or produced in Mumbai. Yet there's something "Bollywoodish" about it, so it can be understood to fit the genre. Hiphop as a "thing" isn't produced by two Indian guys, with the son of India's biggest film star providing the vocals, but as a genre, it can accommodate a hiphop song like "Right Here Right Now" from the 2005 film Bluffmaster.

I think it's good to keep in mind both hiphop and Bollywood as 'things', because those I feel like are their "truest nature". It's where the genres stemmed from, and it's where you can still find a lot of variation (so it's not as if its a very purist view). But at the same time, you have to consider the global aspect.

2) Mockery. What's the parody of "Switty", regardless of how funny or poignant it is, aimed at? I would argue the same as those defending it in the FG post - at the endless appropriation of hiphop as a genre by Bollywood film makers because of the idea that hiphop is glamorous, current and cool. But of course, what they really ape is only some aspects of hiphop as a genre - the musical style and the materialistic flair of the music videos (not to mention the objectification of women). So there's bling, cars and girls, not well-crafted lyrical output about the racism of the police or such issues.

I don't think Switty's a fantastic parody - it runs the risk of becoming the thing it mocks to the casual viewer, who will just see as another hiphop-inspired Bollywood promotional video and react accordingly. But I also don't think it's saying, "this is how silly hiphop is". To do that, it would just be ignorant, the same way in which some "Bollywood-inspired" things made in the West come off as insulting because even if they come from a place of love, they boil "Bollywood" as a thing or as a genre down to rather shallow "essentials", which can upset those fans of Indian films who find meaning in the lengthy dance numbers or other factors which these "inspired" thing contain.

3) Who gets to perform, and on whose terms? In hiphop, this is a much more pertinent question than it is for Bollywood, but applies to Bollywood as well, to a certain extent. It's obvious that hiphop's roots are not in the materially rich living portrayed in numerous music videos. At the same time, there are middle class rappers, too. I don't think it's my place to really chip in on this debate; while I do think that hiphop has become a global form of expression and I think a lot of respected, ground-breaking MC's have voiced similar opinions, it's really difficult to draw the lines of what 'feels' appropriate and what doesn't. And a whole other issue is just what is good music and what isn't.

Is Imran Khan performing a mockery of hiphop? In this case I feel like I can confidently say no. He is mocking a 'wannabe' who idolises certain aspects of the hiphop "culture", and the fact that most aspects are rather superficial. But what about white people performing Bollywood style dances and sequences?

Well, it might not be completely insulting, but it can be cringeworthy. I've been thinking about the Finnish bhangra-group, for example. Bhangra is global, but in the sense that desi people make it and perform it and dig it in Punjab, London, Toronto, wherever they may be in the world, and the audiences can be composed of various ethnicities. What are pasty Finns doing declaring their own sub-sect of this genre? I am biased, of course, and one of the things that bothers me is that I understand the lyrics to the song, whose title translates "leaders/commanders are invicible", which hardly gives off the vibe of a respectful tribute, but more of a boast. If you're going to borrow the musical stylings of another culture, at least be respectful. Or maybe I'm just easily irritated...

In terms of "Right Here Right Now", which I reference in the title of the post, it has to be said that this song only takes in aspects of hiphop, and while done in love, can be rather goofy in the way that Abhishek lives out his "rapstar" fantasy in the video. But for all its "trying too hard", it comes out as rather sympathetic to me, as does "Switty" in the end, even though it's more the bits of the movie that they show that make me want to see Delhi Belly, not the promotional video as a whole.

Or am I just a Bollywood apologist, easy to find fault in everything else but it? I don't know. I recognise that there are issues surrounding the problems and I do wish that certain Bollywood film makers would also think twice before making the "hiphop style" music videos for promotion of their films.

Until they do, hiphop producers outside India will rake in good money from the global success of their genre.. Has Bollywood gone down that path as well? Will it? That's probably a topic for another post.

Festival filmi - Lucky by Chance & Raavan.

Helsinki International Film Festival, which typically takes place in late September, is the only time I get to see Bollywood films in a Finnish theater. It's always a special occasion and therefore it matters a lot which films get shown, as the last thing I want is for the highlight of my Bollywood year to be a crappy film I had no intention of ever seeing, or have seen already and absolutely hated. Last year, they went for Shahrukh's Billu (incredibly unfortunate way of spelling the name, as it sounds like a slang word for female genitalia to most Finnish ears!), which I quite liked (review here) and Jodhaa-Akbar. The year before that, Chak De India.

So their picks have been quite good in recent years and this year they definitely hit the jackpot - two films I hadn't seen and especially in the case of Raavan, REALLY wanted to see.

Now the first film, Zoya Akhtar's directorial debut Luck By Chance was a fun watch among the festival audience, who typically aren't all Hindi film afficianados. My friend's boyfriend commented afterwards that he thought the film fell nicely between the two types of cinema often to be considered polar opposites - Bollywood and Hollywood. I agreed with him; there was the trademark sentimentality to mark this was Indian, where feelings are allowed to be shown, but there was also that groundedness and low-key acting that is familiar to people who mostly consume Hollywood films.

On the other hand, the story wraps and tangles itself around the inside workings of Mumbai's film industry. Virtually everybody making films in the city features in the movie, so much so writing a list of people who aren't in the film feels like less of an imposing task. The cameos are fun to spot but most praise should go the familiar faces we see in actual roles; Rishi Kapoor as the producer, Juhi Chawla as his wife, and Dimple Kapadia as the former starlet.

The main plot tells the love story of two strugglers, outsiders trying to make it in Hindi films; Vikram (Farhan Akhtar) and Sona (Konkona Sen Sharma). Konkona, as ever, is an utter delight but I found myself being not that impressed with Farhan's performance. While I loved him in Rock On, in here it just shows too much that he hasn't done acting a lot, and while Vikram starts out as an intriguing character, he ends up rather a puzzlingly empty one. I don't know what he's feeling because Farhan isn't projecting anything into the character. He's just there, looking wooden.

So that's my biggest complaint about the otherwise good movie. It doesn't make my favourites list, but I am so very glad I finally saw it, and that I also got to hear viewpoints from two people who hadn't seen a whole ton of Bollywood. And of course, Baawre remains an awesome audiovisual experience, one of my favourites.

Raavan is such a difficult film to talk about. I was set out to love it; Aishwarya acts well in Mani Ratnam's films, as does Abhishek, and Vikram of course I know to be stellar in nearly everything he does. ARR soundtrack, excellent cinematography to expect, intriguing epic basis for the story in Ramayana and we're pretty good to go, surely? Well, not so much.

Aishwarya's Ragini is good; she doesn't submit to her status, even when she becomes a plaything between two men and their power struggle. She's strong, she's fearless yet vulnerable, she's just a very intriguing, good take on the Sita character. Abhishek's Beera is interesting, as well, but I can't really get a hold of this character. I prefer Abhishek's performances in Yuva and Guru, where the characterization is strong enough to fit the excellent performance. In here, the character feels a little under-written. He has a background, he's got motivations, he's got his quirks, but there doesn't seem to anything that ties all of these together and would make the performance really incredible.

Vikram as Dev is more straight-forward and therefore better, to the point where I struggle whether the fault in why I don't feel the same about Beera, the main character of the film, lies in acting ability or script or what. The plot comes off as a tad uneven - it's slow-moving, then it's fast, then it wastes time on songs with very little connection to anything (and aren't all that). I was interested in where Aishwarya's character would end up so I wasn't exactly bored, but there was just something about the film that makes it all seem like a bit of a mess assembled from really good components. The cinematography, for example, is amazing, and the mood of the film is occasionally really good.

I might've just had extremely high expectations - god knows that's happened before. But I came out of the film a little unsure, and my friend was pretty underwhelmed, too. I've seen 20 minutes of the Tamil version on youtube (the rest was blocked) and will probably see how I feel about Vikram's take on the character Abhishek played here.

My most positive feeling walking out of the theater was this: I cannot believe I've finally seen Vikram on the big screen, something I never imagined I'd get to do. Let's hope it won't be the last time.


(Once again, sorry for radio silence. Other interests have completely taken over my free time, and uni's pretty demanding this year as well.)

Bunty aur Babli steal your heart & valuables.

Bunty aur Babli (2005), the bombastic masala thrill about two con-artists gaining fame all around India, directed by Shaad Ali Sehgal, always takes me back to my Indian film newbie years. I saw some promo pictures for the movie and got pretty excited about it. It just looked so colourful and amazing, and I'd seen Rani Mukherjee in Hum Tum and really liked her in that. It was the first Bollywood movie I didn't just randomly come across or get recommended or anything. It was a movie I sort-of-found on my own, and got excited about seeing it.


The movie's inherently tied to those first impressions and memories of it. How at first I really enjoyed it but not unconditionally - I thought it had some flaws (given, I still do). But it also just works, on so many levels, and nowadays, when I rewatch it, I am able to dig beyond those first impressions and appreciate it all the more.

So, instead a proper review, have a series of random, spoilerous observations -- and if you haven't seen the movie, drop everything you're doing and get your hands on it. Consider this a huge recommendation. It's really so worth it.


1. I adore the love story, the way their bond slowly and subtly develops. A part of why this film is so special to me is because I think I saw it at the point in time when these stars hadn't crystalized in my mind, and when I watched the movie I only saw characters. Don't get me wrong, this happens nowadays, too, with good movies particularly. But back then, I really wasn't watching Abhishek and Rani at all - I was watching Bunty and Babli, or Rakesh and Vimmi, and seeing them come together. It was just great. Despite their gentle bickering, Vimmi's tantrums and all, they gel perfectly together, and it's just all too sweet. Plus they can be surprisingly steamy together.

2. And there are so many awesome, cutesy coupley moments and bits that could easily go in my top 10 of anythings. Like Vimmi drunkenly explaining her past love history during their wedding night (and Rakesh coyly trying to talk her into consumating). Or their wedding ceremony, where she leads him around the fire. Or when she tells him to stop drinking and come help her check out the rooms of the hotel they just "bought" (the implication just makes me grin). And the moment before they finally get together, when Vimmi asks him, "You think you can live without me?" and Rakesh has to defiantly answer "Yes," before succumbing and admitting, "No."

Vimmi's foxiest moment.

3. The cons!! The cons! Given, we don't see enough of them -- though what we do see is just so much fun, what with the costumes and everything. I especially love the Taj Mahal bit, Abhishek's whole get up, from the way he holds his cell phone to the bit where Foreigner-ji tells him, "I can't believe somebody is selling the Taj Mahal!" and he replies, "I can't believe somebody is buying!". I also liked this little consistency I noticed on this rewatch; in most of the cons, Vimmi plays the "head honcho", be it the person Q.Q.Qureishi has to impress, the lady minister selling the Taj Mahal or the foxy businesswoman buying a dozen washing machines.


4. The soundtrack is still lively and awesome. And I noticed that S-E-L also did the background score, which you can tell on the second half, when the plot goes all 70's masala and the music accompanies that change. It's just really lovely listening.

5. Speaking of that 70's style, I think while BaB could've pulled it off much better - make it snappier and less draggy at that point in the plot - it is a really splendid tribute to 70's style masala. Escaping hospitals after giving birth, gold heist, train scene like straight outta Sholay .. are wah! I dig it a lot. Especially now that I actually recognize this stuff.

6. This bit always amuses me (and is hypnotic):



And this bit is so adorable:



7. And a million other little things such as...

Vimmi thinking Babli sounds like a "fat" name.

Bunty Aur Babli safe!

Abhishek's party department in the Dhadak dhadak picturization. Hells yeah. Nobody ever said train travel had to be boring! Just be sure to be the only guy wearing red when everybody else wears blue/purple shades.

Height difference is just adorable. Seriously. Adorable.

I love how young and naive and awkward they are in their initial scenes together. They really are perfect fit; both can act confident and be anything they want, but at the core they're both young, unexperienced and still learning things.

Ahhh this scene I love it. I love the constant "Are you being Bunty or Rakesh?" type of questioning and how they kind of get lost in their dual roles but can also pull away from them.

8. I'd definitely still change some things about this film, make it tighter on the second half among other things but generally? Massive, overwhelming filmipyaar. I just wish Rani and Abhishek would be in another movie together anywhere close to as satisfying a watch as this one.

Paa - where even the skeptic in me goes, "Wow."

I had a lot of prejudice regarding Paa, for a lot of the obvious reasons. Amitabh Bachchan's acting skills are so praised that there seem to be no new height for things to be said about them to be reached. If everything he does is the best thing ever (aside from Aag) according to people then nothing he does is the best because there's nowhere for him to go. So there was a real sense of people appreciating him because he was taking this leap and because he was AB, not because
the performance was actually worth praising.

And of course, the gimmick of a father playing a son to his own son, and portraying a child with a genetic defect that allows some believability to that, it all just seemed like too much. I was really uncertain whether this movie was a victim of overhype, whether I'd find anything likable in it, just whether it'd work.

And then I saw it.

And it worked. It really worked.

Ramsu's review convinced me to put aside my prejudice and give this film a try, and I am so glad I did. It's been a while since I've been this affected by a movie. I was just so broken by every emotional cue the film gave me, constantly getting misty-eyed, and utterly in pieces during the final scenes. It was kind of ridiculous, but I also loved it. Sometimes a tear-jerker is just what I needed, and because bullshit family drama ala K3G does nothing to my tear-ducts, films like Paa are in high demand.

Vidya Balan broke me the most. There's just something so believable and captivating about her performance. She simply excels at playing these sort of very grounded characters, and of course she looked absolutely amazing. Abhishek wasn't far behind, though.

And then there's Amitabh. I could critisize certain visual aspects of Auro that don't necessarily make for the most realistic portrayal of somebody with Progeria, and the fact a tall man is tough to shrink down in size. And I could also talk about how the character has a bit of "noble sick person" syndrome happening. But you know what? I don't really care. I just bought it, and that's the chief victory of this performance.

The cinematography and editing were top notch, and even if there was a somewhat unnecessary side plot, it's safe to say I really enjoyed the emotional rollercoaster ride of Paa. Sometimes I guess I should believe the hype.

Golden Kela Awards... smell the prestige.

I don't follow Razzies because I barely watch the good Hollywood movies, so I don't really keep up with the bad ones. But with Bollywood? Bring it!

Golden Kela Awards celebrates the worstness in Hindi cinema. But I think the whole awards are fabulously tongue-in-cheek and I laughed my ass off reading through the winners. It's snark in Awards form! A lot of Indian award ceremonies are not to be taken seriously but this one especially.

Consider for example the "black Award for Emotional Blackmail" that went to Amitabh Bachchan in Paa. I loved Paa but this is so spot-on!

And Critics Award to Taran Adarsh, easily the worst Bollywood critic around (because predicting box office numbers and spoiling endings to films great reviewer not make!). Brilliant.

And Bas Kijiye Bahut Ho Gaya (Stop it that's enough) Award to Madhur Bhandarkar. Yes, yes, yes.

And big big props to Abhishek Bachchan for accepting his Worst Accent award for Delhi-6 so graciously with the following tweet:

Another milestone in my carrer. I won the golden kela award 4 worst accent in Delhi 6. Chalo at least delhi 6 won something. I'm overjoyed!!

As are we, Abhishek!

And last but not least, the ace Cyrus Broacha was awarded the very special, prestigious Cyrus Broacha Memorial Award. His response?

‘It’s great. I’m thrilled. I hope to win this award every year,’ Cyrus said in his cheeky fashion. [source]

Beautiful. Also check out FG's take on these for a bit of alternative perspective.

Snarking star Tweets - the lazy person's blogfiller.

My choice with the picture for this post went something like this, "Oh if Bollywood stars had their own exclusive Twitter site, it should called be Sheroo for the falcon in Dharam-Veer or the pidgeon from Maine Pyaar Kiya. But dammit, I don't have a screencap of either. Oh well. Have a screencap of foxy Zeenat Aman."

Celebrity tweets. We all follow them, we rarely get anything too satisfying out of them. But since my post on Uday Chopra was so successful, I decided to weed through them anyway for some wisdom. Or pseudo-wisdom. Or whatever.

1. Siddharth (@Actor_Siddharth)

I love the heckins out of Siddhu (who on Twitter corrected the world he has no last name, so the whole Narayan meme is false and not to be used) but sometimes his idle tweet-sized thoughts, like those of many celebs, make me think they should learn how to blog before they tweet. Short thoughts are fine, but tend to need expanding on.

Please don't run through life. Stop to smell the flowers. Sometimes they have no scent, but mostly, smelling flowers is fruitful... Jan 2010

I know this is just an old riff on "Carpe diem", the classic, but really now. Smelling flowers is the least fruitful thing you can do. And as for flowers having no scent? Then they're fake and obviously not worth sniffing! Go, run, do whatever you must! No wonder actors are late for shoots..

If something is worth fighting for, I stop analyzing and go for it. I can't play games. I'm tired of being told what to do. Enough nonsense! Jan 2010

This is exactly what I mean. So much to process. We have no idea what "it" is that's worth fighting for and going for it. Why would you analyze if you know something is worth fighting for anyway? What can't of games can't he play? Mind-games? Games of social rules? He's tired of being told what to do. By whom? Being told what to do is your job, yaar. Unless he is talking about something personal, in which case very well, I think I saw a movie like this once. Or is he talking generally, tired of being told what to do, period? What? What is nonsense? The games? Being told what to do? Everything that's not fighting for? If I were to summarize each of my longer posts in 140 characters, they'd come out looking like this. Enough nonsense!

The rest of his tweets are very mundane, promoting his new Hindi release Striker and otherwise sweet. So moving on.

2. Shahrukh Khan (@iamsrk)

I think this guy's been in some movies so I thought I'd take a look at his Twitter.

do u think of the future.not like the future tomorrow and what u will have for breakfast. but the long term view & how the world will change - Jan 2010

Dude starts off light. Just a little bit of future speculation, quoting George Carlin in the mix. I'm a wild child, Shahrukh. I don't even think about what I'll have for breakfast. I don't stop to smell the flowers, I grab them as I run. Anarchy!

then the low fat fad followed. low fat yogurt. ok.low fat cheese..makes sense...but low fat butter and then low fat celery?how low can u go! - Jan 2010

I enjoy a bit of low fat gravel. (But seriously, I chuckled at this entry.)

COME 2 THE EDGE..no v cannot v r afraid COME 2 THE EDGE..no v cannot v will fall COME 2 THE EDGE..they came & he pushed them..and they FLEW! - Jan 2010

An anonymous poem recited by him ...on Twitter. New media, meet old media. Old media, prepare to get absolutely slaughtered. I want to pat this poor poem's head. And it ain't SRK's fault but man, don't recite poetry in 140 characters. C'mon man!

3. Abhishek Bachchan (@juniorbachchan)

Typo AGAIN!! Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow.

I have finally found my traffic song..... "Move b?#*@ get out the way" - mystikal and ludacris. MINDBLOWING!

Naughty by nature- hip hop hurray!!! Heyyyy, hoooo, heyyyy, hoooo

Yes! Coffee consumed! Feeling like leo in titanic (before it sank)!! KING OF THE WORLD!..ok just met dad. Back to pauper status! Ahh life.

I have nothing to say, apart from how I wish I had Abhishek's sexcellent taste in hiphop and even just a quarter of his joy d'vivre.

4. Riteish Deshmukh (@Riteishd)

Earlier NEWS was printed in lines, today papers print LINES that eventually become NEWS - Jan 2010

Wow, deep, bro. Except ... wait, what?

Which film are you most excited to watch IRONMAN 2 or SHREK 4 - Jan 2010

'Cause they have so much in common, like ... the ... thing with the .. uhh .. number in the title? And they're .. both in English? Oh man, battle of the century. It's on now!

One thing that strikes me as a go through Riteish's twitter is that I've got nothing against the dude, but as I read his twitter, it's just so magnificently boring. He does actually have some - short - commentary on what he reads in the papers and the films he watches but in general none of it is snark-worthy. Sigh.

5. Lara Dutta (@DuttaLara)

It took 250 million dollars to make AVATAR. Its a HUGE deal if a movie is made for even 25 million in India! We r a long way from an AVATAR! - Dec 2009

I can't really snark this tweet because it just annoyed me when I read it (though I typically enjoy following Lara's tweets, which are never stupid or even incredibly dull) and even more after I actually saw Avatar. Bigger isn't better. Even most Hollywood films can't reach Avatar's insane budget. Or the crappy, clichéd storyline. If a measure of a movie is really how much money is spent on it, it's a sad, sad state of things. Here's an idea; make a movie that's good with less moolah, make your money back easier, and everybody benefits.


Dear Every Celebrity on Twitter,

We get it's cool that people are supporting you. It's wondrous to be a filmstar and get to interact we fans. We get you want to be grateful. But for god's sake, step it up. Everytime you begin typing "thank you", stop, and type something else. Type a song lyric. Type a half-assed quote. Type a piece of wisdom, even if it's "food is for babies". Anything.

Do it for your followers. But most importantly, do it for me. I quite like doing these posts.

With love, affection, and anticipation for all your releases, no, really, I'm not being sarcastic ...or am I?

Veracious (@veraciously), of Sotheydance.blogspot.com

IFAC #10: Antarmahal, or: I need a rewatch.

Can I review a movie I barely remember details from? Antarmahal: Views of the Inner Chamber (2005) is the only Bengali film I've seen so far, and my reasons for viewing it were perhaps a tad too fangirly for the sort of artsier feature it ended up being, considering it's directed by Rituparno Ghosh.

Jackie Scroff plays an oppressive head of a rich household in 19th century Bengal. He has a wife (Rupa Ganguly) put decides to get a new, younger one (Soha Ali Khan), much to the older wife's discontent. Being the douchebag he is, he also wants to suck up to the Brits by replacing the face of Goddess Durga with the face of the Queen, and hires a non-Bengali sculptor (Abhishek Bachchan, with eyeliner!) to do the job.

As you can imagine by considering the fact it's a Bengali art film, the pace is slow and shots linger on seemingly unimportant details. I'll just come right out and say it: I may understand these sorts of films but when I watched it, I was far too lazy to figure it out. However, in an interesting way, the film still delivered. Rupa Ganguly's performance was excellent and incredibly intense, erotic but completely silent chemistry between Abhishek and Soha made the film worth watching.

Still, as far as anything else goes, it's hard to grasp what the film maker was actually getting at. The film has been described as graituitously erotic. Besides the interest between Abhishek and Soha, there is Rupa Ganguly's character whose sleazy husband makes her satisfy Brahmin priests. He also tries to sleep with Soha's character, also with a priest present in order to perform the necessary rites to make sure she becomes pregnant with a son for him, but she keeps rejecting him.

Even after I finished watching I knew I needed to rewatch to really sink my teeth into this movie. But then, years went by, and I never bought the DVD to have that rewatch. I just didn't care, I suppose. Some art films feel like they reward the effort of rewatches, the effort of picking them apart. Others just fail to impress as movies, regardless of artistic intent. Antarmahal always seemed more of the latter, and not enough of the first.

Quickfire thoughts to fuel procrastination.

1. Kareena, if only you'd gotten your hands on this hottie during the 90's...

2. It's been brought to my attention that Wanted has several things I like, such as Prabhudeva in the director's seat, Vinod Khanna as a guest appearance and Prakash Dad as Prakash Something-other-than-Dad. As a result? Kind of dying to see the film now. Can't wait!

3. I finished watching Tum Haseen Main Jawaan on my brand new TV tonight. So, that movie was a little too crazy. Am I getting old?

4. Just make a movie together, guys. You know we want you to, we know you want to, and it'll satisfy Aamir's Shahrukh-hugging quota. Poor fella.

5. Abhishek and Aishwarya on Oprah. Question: why does anybody watch Oprah? Most pointless talk show ever. Superficial questions, short interviews, barely anything to them. Still, Abhishek's sense of humor salvaged the wreckage for me.

6. That TV show Psych's Bollywood episode: cute! Sendhil from Heroes got to actually do something! Not perfect (an Indian character mispronounced "Raj", come on now) but definitely a good effort.

7. And in a lieau of Bollywood-related things, America's Best Dance Crew's Bollywood challenge? The less said, the better. I dig this show a lot but it didn't mix. It just didn't.

8. I don't even remember which movie this picture is from but as it's named "ILUPRAKASHRAJ.jpg" (ILU = I love you), I guess so much needs to be said.

Star interviews - our favourites.

Stars don't have it easy, as this picture of the deeply frowning, pensive-looking Saif Ali Khan demonstrates. Interviews are a tough gig; how to not show your deep hatred of journalists while answering their questions to make sure you do your bit for some film's marketing. I don't read a whole ton of interviews but based on what I've read of Saif's, I can say this dude does not dig the journo's. As probably don't a lot of stars, he's just not as good at masking it.

But I was reminded me of some of my favourite star interviews when listening to the LoveBollywood podcast from months back which featured Shahrukh Khan and Lara Dutta discussing then-new Billu (Barber).

One of the hosts: Shahrukh, how should I do my hair?
Shahrukh: But then what will we do to your face?

Call me weird, but I laughed out loud at that.

So, some of my favourite interviews that come to mind...

BAFTA goes Bollywood with Aamir Khan - Aamir's interviews tend to be favourites of mine because the man has a lot of good stuff to say but this one stands out because in here he talks about getting into the physicality of his characters. While some non-fans will roll their eyes at his lite method acting discussions, it's a great interview, very interesting and a must watch for people who love the guy.

Most Salman Khan interviews - I don't get the vitriol some people have for this guy. Sure, he's past his heyday and has the worst picks in films sometimes, and there's a lot of very nasty rumors about him circling around. But in interviews he always seems like a really relaxed guy with a clear sense of self and a truly quirky sense of humor. I'd link to the CNN-IBN interview that made me well aware of this fact some years back but I can't find it.

Farhan Akhtar on LoveBollywood when Rock On!! was releasing - Since this is no longer available on the BBC website, download link here. Farhan talks about how he got into acting, how he wrote and worked on DCH, and his other films, too. He's a smart chap, and this is one of the best LoveBollywood interviews I've listened. I loved it the first time I listened through it, and after I saw Rock On, I had to go back and give it another listen.

Koffee with Karan, season 1, Abhishek & Preity - I thought KwK was always an incredibly overappreciated chat show. Karan was not the best of hosts, but some episodes really stand out because the guests are friends with each other, and friends with Karan and actually comfortable enough to discuss interesting things and even mock Karan a little. This is one of those episodes. And it made me want to see them together in a movie, which happened eventually in the form of Jhoom Barabar Jhoom. Since the series got a DVD release, it must have been yanked down from youtube, but if you can, seek it out and watch it.

Siddharth on Filmfare (aka the True Angry Young Man Interview) - Scans of it here. Newsflash! Sidd is no big fan of journos, so much so I feel bad for the interviewer. This dude comes of as cold and refuses to discuss anything not to do with his movies. He has some very strong opinions on South vs North which I can agree with, and even on the success of his own movies. Siddharth's an unique character in the film industry - not really there to make friends and rub elbows with big names, just to work and do his best at it. Fascinating interview on the real personality behind Indian cinema's cutest face. (Only for true fans; some non-fans might be turned off by this.)

Bluffmaster's making of - This is either the most honest interview ever or the most honest deceitful one. Probably the latter. It's just fantastic. Riteish talks about how he's the real star of the movie, Abhishek talks about why people call Boman Irani a great actor because he's old.. It's just great. Search it on youtube if you don't own the DVD yet.

So here were my favourites (or some of them). How about yours?

That gay movie which is entirely non-homosexual whatsoever, no, sirree: Dostana.

When reviewing Dostana, I find myself knee-deep in a dilemma. Sure, it's a fun light romantic comedy more than anything else, and over anything the film tries to emphasize (as can be seen in the title) friendship. At the same time, a lot of the promotion, a lot of the hype and yes, a lot of the discussion after the film's release discusses one thing in particular: portrayal of homosexuality.

A funny thing about the film's promotion is in a way very telling of the film itself. They flirt with the idea of homosexuality quite loudly all around, jokes are being made about John-Abhishek being "jodi number one" and the part of the plotline is heavily emphasized. Then it's time to pull back on the reins, underlining the fact that Sam (Abhishek Bachchan) and Kunal (John Abraham) are only pretending to be gay in order to land a sweet apartment in gorgeous Miami, they're not actually gay, they're womanizing, very very heterosexual guys. Time to say, "the movie is about friendship, it's not trying to send a message".

Honestly, I don't blame them. It's a commercial film and making a straight-forward message film or a social commentary might hurt its chances at the box office. Karan Johar may be considered brave for making KANK but he's also got a business sense. If India's the country where homosexuality is still technically illegal, it's probably not quite ready for a Brokeback Mountain.

So how about the film itself? There's good and there's bad. Some of the portrayal of homosexuals (because yes, the film features some genuinely gay characters) is undoubtedly stereotypical, but not mean-spirited at all. There's allusions made to gay people being "not-all-male" which I mostly found really misinformed. At the same time, we see general acceptance - it's played up for comedy, certainly, but it's definitely there.

As far as performances go, Abhishek and Priyanka Chopra (playing landlady's foxy daughter Neha) win all the way. Movies like these make you wonder why Abhishek bothers with serious roles at all; he's just that good at comedy. John Abraham left me cold (yeah, I know, what the--). Maybe it's the role simply being more restricted than Abhishek's. Maybe it's just that he's not that great an actor (sorry, fans!).

The soundtrack is delightful and while there are some definite flaws in the second half (so much so that for a moment the film becomes a borefest, not a funny entertainer), which I won't get into as I'm trying to keep the review spoiler-free, Dostana is quite a fun ride. Let's hope the director, besides stepping out of Karan Johar's shadow, might actually also avoid some typical KJo mistakes with his next project.

Superficial charms; hottest men and women of Indian films.

Inspired by an entry posted by Nicki, and by some thoughts that occurred to me during my umpteenth rewatch of Hum Tum last night, here are some stunningly good-looking people that grace our screens. Your mileage may vary, this is just a list according to my tastes.

Saif Ali Khan, here as not-a-good-man in Ek Hasina Thi, the film he looks best in and acts his best in, at least until we got Omkara.

Abhishek Bachchan, doing the guh-worthy eye-brow thing in Jhoom Barabar Jhoom. Mon amour, Ricki Thukral.

Vikram making clothes most reminiscient of tinfoil look good in Arul.

Vinod Khanna being his magnificient self in Sachaa Jhutha.

Surya looking smouldering alongside Laila in Nandhaa.
Random, slightly odd but stunning handsome pic of Akshay Kumar all the same.

R. Madhavan, dreamy as ever, in Guru.

And now onto the ladies..


Hema Malini then.

Hema Malini now.

North-Indian girl in South-Indian movies; Jyothika.

Not the best of actresses (not even close), but I can't resist her smile. Katrina Kaif from Singh is Kinng here.

The wonderful Kajol.

Always a darling, Juhi Chawla in Hum Hai Rahi Pyaar Ke.

Regal Zeenat Aman in Dharam-Veer.

Smile of the century: Rani Mukherjee in Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic.

Doll-esque pose of Preity Zinta in a recent magazine.

Classic beauty: Madhubala in Chalti Ka Naam Gaadi.

Was that more gals than guys? I guess it just goes to show - Indian women are gorgeous! Indian men, well, only nearly as..